AFFIRMATIONS, BELIEFS, Esteem

AFFIRMATIONS

Where negative statements can be accepted as true in our children’s mind, so too can positive statements. We call these Affirmations, and they can be used to counteract and overcome a negative, unhelpful belief, or reaffirm something wanted, bringing about positive thoughts and feelings. They’re positive statements said as if they are already true.

As adults we may feel a bit silly saying them at first, but children are less self-conscious. They’ll find affirmations a fun way to program their minds and to plant and grow positive suggestions in their subconscious. But what’s really great is if they can accept these positive suggestions while young, then there will be less reprogramming to be done as they get older. 

To encourage this habit, they need to think of a positive statement in the present tense that they can relate to. The language needs to be simple, using words they would use in everyday speech and that’s appropriate for their understanding. If too complex, they’ll be less likely to understand or take the statements on board. It’s better they choose their own affirmations they feel comfortable with saying, these can be written if the child is old enough, to compliment and reinforce the verbal affirmation but are best said aloud repeatedly. They need to be short, simple, positive, uplifting, motivating, and believable. Such as; ‘I am now learning more and more every day.’ Repetition is key to affirmations and the more they practise using positive affirmations, the easier they get and the better they start to feel about themselves and their capabilities.

This probably won’t surprise you to know, but while children are speaking and thinking positively about themselves, it’s impossible for them to think negatively, and then fear, worry, anxiety, anger, and frustration disappear.  This is useful if they are struggling in some area, such as learning how to read, instead of listening to their self-defeating mental chatter, they can replace it with positive self-talk and could say; ‘I enjoy learning how to read, reading is fun, and I am now finding it easier and easier to read.’ 

We can clearly understand how this approach is more helpful than what children usually say such as;

‘I can’t read, I hate reading, it’s hard.’ Convincing themselves with their own words that they cannot read, not realising that they are the ones holding themselves back. Children confuse lack of experience and confidence in something, such as reading, as a lack of ability, and believe they do not, cannot, and will never be able to do it. Any mistakes they encounter only reinforce this, knocking their confidence further, we can minimise the risk of this happening by introducing our children to affirmations.

I like the affirmation bowl. Write out some affirmations on some post it notes and mix them up in a bowl and ask your child to pick one each morning and evening before bed. Then notice how their behaviour and  language becomes more positive and how their self- esteem and confidence improves.

Stay Present,

Em x

MUM GUILT, SELF-CARE, SELF-LOVE, The U URSELF Routine, U Time

What will you be doing this weekend?

It’s finally the weekend!

A chance for us to shut off that constant mental chatter, stress, worry, work and woe.

A time to do those things we love to do, for the sheer enjoyment of doing them.

Freedom to indulge in our pleasures and be with those special people we love?

Hang on…. What do you mean you wish?

What will you be doing this weekend if not any or all of the above?

We all deserve a break, even You.

Work and Worries Never End!

There’s always going to be laundry in the basket and an un-surmountable pile of paperwork or emails harassing us. Our work doesn’t cease to exist because it’s the weekend either. And those work issues can dwell in our minds constantly if we let them, taking up our time and attention, even on our days off.

But when are we free to enjoy life and those we love most?

Totally free to be in the moment and do nothing without feeling guilty?

It’s a rare occasion for most of us.

But today if you only do one thing, free your mind with some U Time.

We all know this is easier said than done, but when we consciously make space and time just for U Time, like we would cooking tea for the kids or washing the school uniforms, then we allow ourselves the chance to relax into the present moment. When we focus on the moment, this very minute that we are currently experiencing, we can’t ruminate on the past or worry about the un-lived future. Although that seems so obviously basic, it eludes us all.

We get caught up in the humdrum, daily dramas of our everyday lives. The unimportant, insignificant details, that cloud our true purpose and reality.

Robbing us of our peace of mind that we are all seeking but never find for long.

Letting Go

If only we could just temporarily let go and have five minutes peace?

Why not try?

Find a space that’s relaxing, quiet and away from all distraction’s, switch off your electronic devices and phones.

My Meditation U Time Space

I have a space in my home where I place crystals, stones and candles. When I spend U Time there I let go of everything that’s mentally cluttering up my head and watch the fog drift away. Finding things that calm you or bring you joy will help, you don’t need buddha’s or crystals, if they aren’t your thing listen to a water feature or look at a painting, smell some aromatherapy oils, anything you feel comfortable with that signals to you this is U Time.

Make sure no one will disturb you and either sit or lay down somewhere, in a nice comfortable position. Surround yourself with cushions or soft warm blankets if that helps?

And take in some slow deep breathes.

Feel where your tension resides in your body?

We are all different, one person may carry their tension in their neck and shoulders, another in their jaws or buttocks. Wherever it feels uncomfortable breathe into it, focusing on that place, and allow it to release, as you breathe out gently and slowly.

There’s no -where to go, nothing to do, and no one to see, so you are absolutely free.

Free your mind of mental chatter and you’ll free your muscles of tense matter.

This is ‘U Time’ feel free to let go and relax. You can’t do this wrong, you just breathe.

Melt into whatever is supporting your body and just keep breathing, and as you do so, say to yourself;

‘Let go.’

‘Let go.’

‘Let go.’

Don’t just say the words, feel them, like a warm, comforting sensation flowing through you.

Practice this letting go and breathing to free your mind, until you get bored.

But I warn you, this state of pure relaxation and freedom of thought is addictive and hard to break, but it’s a great habit to make.

So, …. how will you spend your weekend now?

If you would like some help learning to relax and let go, then book your free Mumatherapy Consultation today! All bookings for September 2021 made in May will receive a 20% discount, please quote Muma May when booking.

Stay Present, Em x